All Posts

On the outside I looked like the picture of health because I was eating all the "right" things, not eating all the "wrong" things (at least in public), and exercising intensely (because more is always better, right?). But behind the scenes I was anxious and depressed, having panic attacks on a regular basis, unsettled in my life, spending all my extra energy on obsessing over what I did and didn't eat and how I planned to exercise, smoking to suppress my appetite, cycling bet

Nothing tastes  as good  as skinny  feels.   Nothing wastes as much - Joy, Energy, Pleasure, Connection - as Diet Culture steals.   Let's stop equating weight with health. Let's stop forgetting about mental health in the whole equation. Let's stop praising weight loss and shaming weight gain. Let's stop viewing "fat" as anything but a neutral descriptor.

When our bodies are in an energy deficit (i.e., don't have enough calories), our brains interpret that to mean that resources are scarce (even if they aren't), and we can feel compelled to steal food and other resources. It can feel incredibly confusing and shameful to find yourself stealing food (and maybe other things too), if you don't know that it is an understandable and not uncommon aspect of dieting/disordered eating. When my disordered eating first began in high schoo

Restricting our food puts a tremendous amount of stress on both our bodies and our minds.   It is emotionally and physically taxing. It leaves us in a depleted state.  It is all the more likely to lead us to a “fuck it” state of mind when it comes to drinking. This is the opposite of what we need if we are trying to quit drinking or to stay sober.

Whatever you did to keep yourself safe, it brought you here. And for that, I am so grateful. I hope you give yourself all the grace you deserve.

I have often heard people in recovery voice concern that they've moved from using an addictive substance to cope, to using food to cope. And they are worried that the two are the same. They are not. You need one to live, and not the other. One can cause real harm, and not the other. What is often not said aloud, is that people are worried about using food to cope because they are worried about it causing weight gain. In those cases, the problem is not using food to cope, it i